A Little Hiatus...

Although I love blogging...I have decided to take a little hiatus! I am in such a good, positive, happy place in my life right now and I really want to focus on the girls, finding a job, enjoying my life, and my love, Matt. Diabetes has been so in the fore front with my last job, my life, Lily's life, etc. We are all doing so well right now and just filled with happiness. Lily actually asked me why I can't stop smiling anymore the other day. I just laughed. I am happy...for the first time in a very long time, I am truly, utterly happy and fulfilled. Well, except for the job part...every other part though is just amazing.

So, when I write, I tend to write more on the negative things...I feel like I have realized, accepted, and am now exploring what I want to work on with myself. I am still here. I am still living a great life. And when I feel the need to write and I cross this hump...I'll be back! I'll still be reading though! xxoo

Staying Positive...

I sit here today in frustration. Partly because I am exhausted. Lily was 149 when it was time for bed. I had gotten the girls a cookie from Dessert Gallery earlier in the day and I let them split it last night. I gave her the correct bolus for it and put her in bed. At 11, she was 200ish. At 2, she woke me up...she had peed in the bed because she was in the high 300's. Big. Huge. Sigh. Damn cookie. Damn diabetes. Damn me for staying up late AGAIN. So, I corrected her and she crawled in bed with me. At some point, Abby had come down and crawled in my bed as well. I spent the better part of the night hanging off of my side while my children were sprawled out sleeping like little angels.

I woke up at 6:00 and hit snooze up until Matt called at 6:20 and pretty much made sure I was out of bed (thank you baby). The three of us were dragging but made it on time to school. I was supposed to come home and run again but was just too damn tired and too focused on job searching. So, I got on the computer and went to work.

There is so much rejection in job searching. I hate it. I know I have the skills, education, ambition and motivation to succeed at just about anything. Problem is, selling yourself on a little piece of paper is not so easy. So, I am now trying to call by doing some detective work on these companies. We'll see what happens.

I am remaining positive though! Things are not too bad yet and I can always get a temp job at any time. I am lucky to have a supportive family and supportive friends. I am lucky to have a good head on my shoulders. I am lucky to have a roof over my head and a fully stocked fridge. I am lucky to have two amazing little girls to cuddle up to and love on. And...I am lucky to have the love of my life by my side cheering me on. I am lucky because these things are what really matter and keep me going. It is easy to focus on the negative and stay in a rut. I have no desire to do that though. Why would I? What could possibly come of that?

Amy...

Had to share this because it was so sweet and I needed it so bad today...this is what life is all about! This is what blogging is all about...helping each other out! Thank you Amy!!!! And read Amy's blog. Her oldest, Ben, is autistic. Her youngest, Josh, has CHD (Congenital Heart Disease). Amy never slows down, never gives up, never gives in...she just lives every day to the fullest that she can possibly can. Love you girlie!

Oh...and I found about shabbyblogs.com from Amy too! :)

http://amyfromtheheart.blogspot.com/2011/05/for-kimberly.html

Diabetes Overwhelmus...

I am pretty sure I have "Diabetes Overwhelmus" as they say at CWD FFL. I am on overload. I feel like screaming. I need a little break. Just a tiny one. I have done it to myself by reading so many blogs this past week. I logged on to Facebook this morning and noticed that every single person that shows up on my home screen is from diabetes...lots of organizations. I have like 3 different JDRF pages on there. So, I did a little clean up on the Facebook account. My friends were long gone.

I know you can't really take a break from the big D but I need to read some other information on my computer when I am browsing. I can't just look at diabetes related stuff anymore. So, I have been reading about the Arnold. Much more entertaining so thank you Arnold for your entertainment...although I am sure Maria is not so thankful.

I am really looking forward to my little trip to Scottsdale this weekend to see Matt. It's been almost a month since I have seen him and I am anxious to just lay by the  pool while he is golfing, etc. and read my Kindle. Escape sounds like just what the doctor ordered!

D-Blog Week Day Seven-Last Day: What I've Learned From The Doc...

Wow. Too much to write in a little blog about how much I have learned from the DOC. First, I have learned that there are many of us all over the world. I have made friends in so many other countries whose kids are diabetic. I feel like anywhere I go, someone will understand. Second, I have learned that every child really is very different and every parent is very different. We all have the same thing in common, keeping our children healthy, but we all go about it at different levels and in different ways.

I will forever be grateful to the PWD that are adults for giving me a glimpse of what Lily's life will be like as an adult. It has helped me heal tremendously to read about how NORMAL these people are and that they are doing all of the wonderful things that I hoped she would do. It's like proof that this disease won't consume her.

I have also learned about a ton of new products and research! I have gained a better understanding of this disease by reading all about other people's experiences. I really wouldn't have it any other way while fighting this battle. I have always had my local support by the way of close friends for me and for Lily. I have totally enjoyed making friends all over the world that share this journey with me as well!

D-Blog Week Day Six- Snapshots Saturday

A day in pictures!! A typical morning at the Coan house with our morning testing...only little Abby wanting in the action today! :)

 Lily's Kit

Abby checking her blood sugar (97)

Lily checking her blood sugar (131)

D-Blog Week Day Five- Awesome Things

There are a few awesome things diabetes has brought us!

1. The DOC-I am so happy to have found the love and support from this generous community. It is so nice to feel a sense of belonging and have this journey to share with others.

2. My local support- You know who you are!!! I never would have made it through all of this without my close group of D Mamas here in Houston. Knowing everyone is a phone call away is amazing! And our kids getting to play together is wonderful!

3. Our family seems to have gotten a little closer.

4. It has been very humbling for me to see that there is more to life than the average things.

Thanks for all of the support from everyone!!!